I've been reflecting a lot lately on opportunity without maturity. How lucky is one who gets an amazing opportunity? Accepted to your dream college. Offered a six figured job after a year of unemployment. Asked for your hand in marriage by your soul mate. Whatever the dream. Sometimes fortune shines down and we are given what we've always wanted.
But what happens when the timing is wrong? What happens if you are accepted to your dream school but just absolutely can't afford it? What if this job tears you away from your family? What if you're homosexual and your partner proposes before your marriage could be legal? You get the idea. Perfect opportunities become less than perfect situations when the timing isn't right. And the thing about opportunities is, you usually can't control them. So sometimes amazing things come along and we just aren't ready. So what do we do?
The best resolution I can come to is to give your opportunity up and keep going. Now, it doesn't work in every situation, but in general, timing is something defining that we just can't change. If the timing is wrong, then the opportunity isn't right. One of my very favorite people here at Pepperdine was recently offered the position of SLA. Long story short, she ended up giving up the position in favor of something else, though SLA was something she really wanted and giving it up was really hard for her to do. But, the silver lining is so apparent to me. SLA spots are hard to come by, and the application process is very selective. Many people are let down when they don't get accepted. And by giving up her position, my friend gave that opportunity to someone else, someone who really wanted it. So while you may be disappointed when the right thing happens at the wrong time and you have to give it up, take comfort in the fact that you are helping someone else get the opportunity they've been waiting for.
I find myself in a similar situation. Here I am, at Pepperdine, with this amazing opportunity to learn academically and spiritually, all at 75% off. Because of the of my scholarship, I have the opportunity to live in Malibu, California and experience a life most only dream of. This is undoubtedly such a crazy opportunity that I've got. Yet I really think it came along at the wrong time. Though I originally thought of myself as incredibly independent and ready for life as far away as home from possible, I couldn't have been more wrong. I find myself emotionally unready to accept and thrive in this opportunity I've been given. People don't understand how I can be unhappy in my situation: I live in one of the most beautiful places in the world, getting a great education, surrounded by unimaginable people. Yet because this opportunity just came at the wrong time for me, I'm simply unable to appreciate my opportunity to the full extent it deserves.
So what do I do? By giving up this opportunity and going home, I can prepare myself in to the best of my ability to become independent, so if another opportunity comes along, I'm ready to accept it. By giving up my spot at Pepperdine hopefully someone else gets to come here. Hopefully someone will get my scholarship and it will let them live out the opportunity I wasn't ready for. So, I've decided. I'm going home. It isn't an ideal situation, but it is what it is. I'm optimistic that another life changing opportunity will come along sometime in the future, though hopefully when I'm ready for it.
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